So, today Seth had his one year check-up. He had to get three shots...poor little thing...he only cried for a short time-I always hate shot days. He was 23 lbs and 15 oz and 31 1/2 in long. Everything looked fine with him.
Now on to my frustration. This was a new doctor that we went to today. We recently had to get the kids on Medicaid, due to the layoff and loss of job (loss of insurance)...and let me tell you, it has been an experience to say the least. Our old pediatrician (that we have been going to since Shelby's birth) doesn't take Medicaid so we have been trying to find a new doctor. Of course I have all of the kids with me and you can just see the people staring at us as we make our way back to the exam room. Let me just say that it doesn't matter where we go, we always hear comments, but you do expect people in a business setting (like a doctor) to be a little bit professional. So the girl comes in to take Seth's temp and weight and all. She's in there for a little bit and then leaves. The doctor comes in soon, and looks over the kids and her immediate question is "Are all these your kids?" I say, "yes". She has her back to us and is asking questions about Seth and writing the answers down. Her next response is, "Well, I could only afford to have 2." My only problem with this is, I love the attitude that we have these kids so we can live off the government.....up until about a month ago, when Todd lost his job and all, we were doing fine. She goes on to ask if we were finished having kids and I told her I don't know. I should have said, no, we plan to have 5 more!!!!! I get so tired of people being so worried about how many kids we have and if we are going to have anymore!!! It doesn't matter if we go to the store, to church, out for a walk in the neighborhood there are always people staring at us like a sideshow for the circus and asking if they are all ours and if we're going to have anymore. People that we've never laid our eyes on!!!! Why in the world do they feel it is their business???!!!! As you can see, this burns me up, just a little bit. It has been hard for me lately, because people have always had this attitude even when we were doing okay financially and paying for everything ourselves....it has been hard to actually be what everyone thinks we are....(if that makes any sense).
I just wanted to say that I love my kids.....my family is my life. I think that is what hurts me so much, that people could look at these sweet faces of these kids and be so hateful and tell us we've had enough or whatever. Psalms 127:3 Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. A REWARD....and people act like it is the plague!!! (even Christian people) Let me just say, yes, I have bad days and it's not always easy to have so many kids and have them all home all day every day....but then again...I couldn't imagine them not being here!!!
When I found out I was pregnant with Sarah, Spencer was 6 mths old....I was so scared-I cried when I saw the pregnancy test-and immediately my thought was, "what will 'everyone' think". I told Todd and I was crying...he was so happy and made a joke that I finally would get my minivan. We have talked about that many times and how everything has worked out just fine. And Sarah Beth is the craziest child we have, and she definitely spices things up.....I can't even describe her...she's so unpredictable...another one of her "funny" traits. And which kid would we "give back" if we could? None of them. I know this has been a long rant...but this is something that I constantly face and it is hard sometimes. I try to let it just roll off...and it does on the outside, but sometimes it hurts on the inside.
I have struggled here lately with our current situation and finances and all--I am glad that I know that life is more than how much money we have, the kind of insurance we have, where we live or anything else that so many people (lost and saved) are hung up on. I have a wonderful husband who loves me and our kids and does all he can to provide for us...I have 5 great kids that I love with all my heart, and we are happy. I am so glad to know that I have the Lord and He will take care of us...and I know at least He doesn't look at us like we are crazy. He gave us these kids....I just hope He is pleased with how we are raising them. Ps 127:5 Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: I just wondered how many is it 'til your quiver is full??? :-)
Any thoughts? :-)
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9 comments:
I hear your frustration--and we are only expecting our fourth. But I already feel the need to defend having a fourth when we already have girls and "our boy". It's like people think you're justified in having children until you have one of each gender and then they can't understand any reason to have more. We live in such a selfish world, and it's hard not to feel foolish and to feel a need to justify the choices we make. But then the Bible says that we will be perceived as fools by the world because God's wisdom is foolishness to the world.
As far as a "quiver full", I couldn't say what that number is. My personal conviction is that it may be different for different people. I think the most important thing is that we aren't letting our own selfish desires dictate how many (or how few) children we have.
We don't know how many children we'll have. We just take them one at a time...unless we have twins, I guess. :)
Your quiver is full when God says it is! Don't listen to everybody else, it only matters what we hear God speak to us. Thank you for sharing your heart--it's obviously full of love for your family!
I have to comment on this.I found your blog off of the Steece's.I have been through the same situation,in a doctors office even!!She nurse asked "are these all yours??"(I only had 3 of my 4 with me!)We were there at the doctors for a physical to be approved to get custody of our niece)she then said, and you want to be foster parents too!!!???I was speechless.Soem people just don't think before they talk...:)Any way, as a mom to almost 5 I understand!!:)And remeber, Children are a blessing from the LORD!!!We are blessed aren't we??
Keep up the good fight Williams bunch! I would venture to say that you know more of true joy than that doctor has begun to know. And for that, far from feeling intimidated or that an explanation is needed, you ought to pity her.
Interesting conversation about Ps 127:5....because I just went to a baby shower last night and we discussed this very thing! In Jewish tradition, the "quiver" was 15 children. The most children born to a single woman in recorded history is over 60 children--63, I think! Over 4 quivers--whew! So, maybe the next time you experience an ignorant comment towards your precious family, you should just reply that you're working on filling up a quiver. That'll perplex them and give you time to bolt--ha! All this aside, keep your eyes focused on the TRUTH and that, as you know, is the Word of God. Your children are REWARDS from Him. People have different reasons for making the comments that they do. Sometimes those comments really hurt. Our pain here is currency in Heaven. Say a prayer for strength, respond with love, and you can't go wrong. Maybe sometime one of those wayward comments may be an opportunity to share about Jesus' love, provision, and grace! Who knows?! Blessings to you.
You don't know me (I don't think), but I saw the link to your blog from Marti Helms. Anyway, I just wanted to encourage you... as a wife who would LOVE to be a mom... if God continues to bless you with children, keep rejoicing. :-) I don't really understand why people seem to make your family their business. We are on the other side of things, though, and often hear comments like, "You've been married for almost 8 years and you don't have kids yet?!?!" or "So, when are you going to have kids?" People are rude... and big families are GREAT! I am one of 5 kids, and my hubby is one of 8! Enjoy each day that you have with your five, and you can pray that God gives us at least one! :-) (We're going through our 3rd in vitro fertilization cycle next week... and I'm praying for twin boys!) Keep up the good work!
Hello. You also don't know me, I made my way via Marti too. I was recently blogging about this same subject and my own frustration. It truly isn't anyone's business how many children you have, that is a decision between God, your husband, and yourself. God bless your family.
I think people just like to critisize no matter what you choose. My husband and I have 2 wonderful kids and are completely happy, but people constantly ask us why we dont have any more.(I also lost 3 babies to have the 2 I have.) So you just need to worry about what's right for your family.
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